I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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