just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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