butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
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