I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Randomize
