im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
