can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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