I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize