I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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