Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
barbara walters just said penis...
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize