): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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