i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Just puked most of my soul out..
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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