After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
