i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
