Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
