she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I am puke
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Randomize
