I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
