I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Someone came in the potted fern
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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