i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
