lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
The air was thick with penises
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
