i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
