I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize