yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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