Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
