you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
