I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
