If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
