We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
