I hate all girls vehemently.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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