I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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