I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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