is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
