By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
