Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I need to sanitize my soul.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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