I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
