so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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