He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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