big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
