White coat. Heels.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
