guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Even my vagina gasped.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
