some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
