i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize