She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
