We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I wear drunk well.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
