According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Will exercising make me less horny?
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