I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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