Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Randomize
