is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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