just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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