Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
