I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
